Junior Mints were previously only known to me via Kramer from Seinfeld when one flew out of the packet he was eating (whilst watching live surgery) and plopped inside the, um, insides of the patient…. Milk duds too were something that Americans mentioned often in sitcoms and movies that they’d buy at the Candy bar but I’d recently only seen both brands at my corner shop.
Now we all know that the US isn’t exactly world-renowned for the quality of their chocolate (yes, even Godiva. There, I said it) and I wonder if the childish names also have something to do with it? It’s difficult to picture, say, James Earl Jones asking for a box of Milk Duds or Michelle Obama putting ‘Junior Mints’ at the top of her catering requirements. Then again, until recently we had a bar called a Polly Waffle….
Made by Tootsie Roll Industries (just to add further sophistication to the actual product), Junior mints are essentially creamy white mint fondants covered in dark chocolate. The chocolate itself contains a minimum of 32% cocoa solids so it’s closer to a milk chocolate yet doesn’t have any milk in it. Very strange; but the end result is a very dark looking but very very sweet and oily chocolate and not one I’ll be seeking out again.
Hershey Company-owned Milk Duds are little blobs of very chewy caramel coated in some form of milk chocolate whose cocoa solids aren’t mentioned. What is mentioned doesn’t make for comfortable reading: corn syrup, vegetable oil (cocoa butter, palm oil, shea oil, sunflower and/or safflower oil), non fat milk, dextrose, brown sugar, whey, mono and diglycerides, sodium bicarbonate, milk fat, salt, resinous glaze, soy lecithin, tapioca dextrin, vanillin and artificial flavour……
They taste like our Fantails but in rabbit poo form – ie hard little lumps. Like the Junior Mints, the chocolate is an after-thought and the main effort is put into gnawing away at the hard caramel until it softens, melts and disappears. One 52 gram box is considered a single serving, but I could barely make my way through a third of them.
In summary, neither have changed my perception of American chocolate – childish, scary ingredients and next-to-no effort put into the actual chocolate. Avoid.
I tasted milk duds while working at summer camp and I thought they were great. BUT….that was when I was 20-something and had no great discerning taste about chocolate or anything else sweet. As long as it WAS sweet, I was peachy. But that ingredient list..ick. I would not let my children near them…. while I still have control over what they eat, I am trying to indoctrinate/browbeat them about the good foods in life. 70% dark choc, mmmmmmm…
Never did try the mints, though. And with all this type of candy aimed at kids, what with the names and the dinky little packages, is it really any wonder American kids are in the state of health they are in?
Oops, off soapbox now
after watching so many american shows where the kids would scarf milk duds i went and bought a huge box anticipating an arvo of non stop eating but alas i could have wailed in disappointment at the odd taste!
Absolutely – I bought milk duds pretty soon after arriving in the States for my exchange year, and even though that was pre-my entry into artisan chocolate love, I was ultra disappointed. So bland anmd bleurgh! Very glad you feel the same
They seem to be made of nothing but variously disguised oils and sugars.
I think I’ll stick to Oz chocs.
So the Junior Mints are poor cousin to peppermint creams, and Milk Duds poor cousin to Fantales. I thought Junior Mints would be like tic-tacs, and Milk Duds like those little blobs of caramel flavoured chocolate buttons that I can’t remember the name of, but they’re yummy.
I’ve been avoiding American “chocolate” for years and I’ll continue to do so.
CatJB – there’s nothing wrong with standing on a soapbox every now and then and, trust me, your older self would NOT like these
Chocolatesuze, I think that’s how my mum felt when she first tried champagne. To her, it was presented as the most glamorous drink that was just for special occasions and when she finally got to taste it, she decided she preferred coke or vinegar instead!
Hannah, as an exchange student, I think you’d still have been more mature in your tastes than I would have been at the same age. At eighteen, I thought chocolate mousse made from an ‘instant’ packet of powder was the ultimate dinner party dessert….
Wise decision, JahTeh, very wise…..
River, definitely – go for peppermint creams like Hillier’s or Frys and leave these alone and Milk Duds, well, let’s just say that ‘dud’ is very appropriate.
I remember trying both of these a couple of years back and not being impressed either.
Don’t be fooled — America makes some GREAT chocolate — but kids’ candies are not the great stuff. Try Dove chocolates, or one of the fabulous artisan truffle makers like the Chocolate Fetish in Asheville, NC. “American Candy Bars” are junk food, but even then, Snickers, or KitKats, Almond Joy — these are tolerable if not enjoyable for a snack. Milk Duds and stuff are just plain junk.
My friend had found these (milk duds) in our deli around a block away from my house. We’d bought them, wondering what they’d taste like, but the next day they had mysteriously vanished from my secret chocolate cupboard. I didn’t get to taste them but my friend had told me that they were not so great either. Kath, could you please tell me where you could go to get them? Because I haven’t seen them anywhere, and although I have been told to keep away, I’d like to taste them for myself- you know, to see how bad they are.
Sorry, me again. Kath, have you ever tried Godiva? I think it’s one version of quite GREAT American chocolate and well worth the price. Have you done a review?
Fair enough, Laurie. Trouble is, the artisan chocolates don’t ‘travel’ to Australia and it’s the mass-market stuff like Milk Duds that make it over here because a) it’s cheaper and b) we Aussies have heard of it.
C23 – Godiva is very, very expensive here and honestly not worth the price we have to pay for it. There are better versions of locally-made chocolate out there. If someone from Godiva is reading this, I’m more than happy to be convinced otherwise!
They both sound horrible. No wonder Bill Bryson nearly died of pleasure when he reached France and discovered what real chocolate tasted like. It does seem pretty normal for American products, though. The Oreo can’t compete with an ordinary old Delta Cream, let alone a proper biscuit like a Tim Tam, and don’t even get me started on Krispy Kreme donuts
Kath: I appreciate your faith, but I don’t know! I spent my first semester trying every variation of Reese’s product and a goodly number of Ben and Jerry’s before I moved to the fancier stuff. Ah, hell, I don’t regret that a jot
I love me some duds?!